Implementing somatic techniques into different types of therapy continues to prove useful and providers seem to continue to get creative with how they use somatics in therapy. There are many benefits that can be gained from the use of somatic techniques when working on healing and this has proven to be true for couples therapy too.
Somatic couples therapy involves the use of somatic-based approaches to help people access their emotions and learn how to regulate the way their nervous systems respond so that they’re able to be more receptive during sessions and can grow while in therapy. Unfortunately, people who choose to participate in couples therapy tend to struggle with verbal communication (1).
This sometimes happens because these individuals may have built up tension and some form of disconnect that they’re not consciously aware of but causes them to shut down or at least be unable to open up about their wants and needs.
During somatic couples therapy, the provider attempts to maintain structure and focuses on the responses of their participants, checking for signs of nervous system activation and actively implementing strategies that can help participants regulate their nervous systems (1).
What Are the Benefits of Somatic Therapy for Couples?
One major benefit of somatic therapy for couples is that the techniques that are implemented during sessions should improve how the couples communicate, ideally helping them be more effective in their attempts to communicate their wants and needs to each other (1).
It also aims to help couples be more open and respond to each other on an emotional level, which can often improve connection. As a result of these two things, somatic therapy should help couples work through their problems more effectively (1).
As therapists pay close attention to the non-verbal somatic cues of participants, this allows them to recognize the cue and acknowledge it, which means participants are encouraged to pause and recognize how they experience their emotions. This opens the door to discussion for both parties in the relationship (2).
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Taking the time to work through present-moment emotions encourages growth for both the individual and the couple as a whole. This is great as it can positively impact an individual’s long-term relationship satisfaction, which may improve the chances of a relationship lasting a long time (2).
Having a professional recognize when somatic arousal is occurring and pointing it out can make individuals and their partners more aware of how to identify when it occurs and what steps to take to work through it. If one partner is better able to sense when their partner is experiencing somatic arousal, this may improve their ability to pause the interaction and modify their approach or response so they can seem less threatening to their partner and interactions can be productive rather than a battle (3).
Read more: Types of Somatic Therapy: How Different Practices Promote Healing
Is There Touching in Somatic Therapy?
Some types of somatic therapy involve touching, but it’s not as common in somatic couples therapy. Somatic touch therapy involves the use of physical touch to help people recover from and deal with emotional and physical trauma or work through active emotions. There are often emotions and trauma that are built up in your body’s memory and the use of somatic touching can help release these uncomfortable feelings at both an emotional and physical level.
If you’re participating in somatic couples therapy, your provider may touch you if they’re trying to encourage good posture and breathing exercises. The therapist may use their hands to position you in the appropriate position or help make you conscious of your breathing. They may also encourage touching between partners in a nonsexual way to encourage awareness of each other’s physiological reactions during somatic tracking.
There are also somatic practices such as yoga and dance that may encourage touching between partners. Somatic sexual therapy is also an option for individuals and couples who want to improve their connection with their own bodies through physical touch.
Who Needs Somatic Therapy for Couples?
Most couples can benefit from somatic therapy, even those who don’t feel that they’re actively experiencing issues in their relationship. Anyone who could benefit from improved communication skills and guidance in reading their partner’s responses should consider somatic therapy for couples. It doesn’t need to be started because there are issues and it can be started to prevent future issues and grow the relationship they already have.
Somatic practices are often used to promote healing from unresolved trauma. If someone in your relationship has a history of post-traumatic stress disorder or childhood trauma, then somatic therapy for couples could be a good match. This type of therapy encourages participants to experience their emotions in real time and can often help people uncover emotions or tension that they didn’t know they were dealing with (2).
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By helping people uncover their unknown struggles, somatic practices can be used to guide people through their trauma by recognizing it and taking the time to work through it. Working through these issues can be quite challenging, so you should be prepared to support your partner or reach out and support them during and after sessions so they can heal properly and you can grow closer to them.
This type of therapy can be particularly beneficial for a couple who have gone through a traumatic experience together. This could be the loss of a child or something such as the loss of a home in a hurricane. Working through these issues may be a challenge when faced alone, but the support of a professional and somatic practices could be exactly what you need.
Read more: Somatic Bedtime Routine: How it Helps and What it Looks Like
Whether or not somatic couples therapy is “worth it” may depend on who you ask. It may not feel as if it’s worth it at first as reliving trauma or working through bottled-up emotions can be a challenge and it may get worse before it gets better. It requires both a financial and emotional commitment, so you should be prepared to set aside time, money, and energy for your sessions. It’s possible to go to somatic couples therapy alone and some professionals may even encourage individuals to be seen individually prior to starting couples sessions, but this will differ from one couple to the next. It’s even possible to be seen both as a couple and individually at the same time. As with any other therapy, somatic therapy can evoke challenging emotions and requires time and patience. You may discuss any concerns you have about the sessions with your provider. Couples therapy can be incredibly challenging and is likely to encourage people to deal with unhealed trauma or work through challenges that are difficult to talk about. While this is likely to be overwhelming, it’s very healthy to set aside time to work through unhealed trauma. If you have the right provider and support system, then the experience can be incredibly powerful and will encourage healing, which can improve your relationships and overall mental well-being. Frequently Asked Questions
Is somatic couples therapy worth it?
Can you go to somatic couples therapy alone?
Is it healthy to go to couples therapy?
Takeaways
Most couples have a variety of challenges throughout their relationships and sometimes, these challenges can be more difficult to overcome than others. When challenges arise in a relationship, it’s important for both parties to put in the necessary work to overcome them. Sometimes, to be able to overcome the challenges that arise, outside support is required. Luckily there are great practices such as somatic therapy for couples that can help address the issues and provide guidance when working through them.
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SOURCES:
- The Integration of Somatic-Based Strategies into Couples Therapy. (2024, Clin Social Work Journal)
- Somatic Interventions and Depth of Experiencing in Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (2022, International Journal of Systemic Therapy)
- Body Psychotherapy for Couples: Exploring the Somatic Components of Mutual Regulation. (2017, International Body Psychotherapy Journal)